The dark creeped in hours ago, and my neck and shoulders have carried a weight of the day that causes me to ache much older than I am. The continuous dull pain has been my reminder. It’s stabbing and stinging, but it could be so much worse. Hunched over my sink for the fifth time today, washing and drying, this body screaming for rest, I hold back the urge to complain. Although, a slight slip of the tongue divulges what’s in this heart, and He hears, even if no other.
Today, I bypassed crumb ridden floors, mountains of dirty clothes, school books strewn in order to take care of my mama, with youngest in tow. She couldn’t walk today with the pain in her back excruciating. So I made sure she got her morning coffee and pancakes and a hot meal for lunch. Her clothes need folding and bed linens straightened. Her dog needed walking and dishes needed washing.
My mama’s ache-ridden body, which clothes a soul permeating loves fragrance, fails her today. She needed me. I have only recently come to see her as a priceless gift. I missed it before, selfishly blind. Today, as my fingers lingered with the soft fabric of her shirt between them, I lament and my heart aches for my past disdain. Yet, because of her love unconditional, she forgives and gives and she forgets and I get.
I stood before her sink washing her dishes, knowing my neglected pile had hers beat. Grateful, I ponder the countless times she graciously washed my own. I intently listen to her pills as she sorts, and I ache on the inside. I ache for her aches. Although, I do not know how many years left I have with her, I know that I won’t let any more days pass by without showing honor and counting the gift she is to me–to us. And today, my honor and my gift was to be hers.