A call to a deeper place left an unsettling in my heart. Weary just won’t let me rest, so I sought after God, and it was a breakthrough I craved.
Not a breakthrough to get me to a new place, or to find a new blessing to add to my already abundant lot. Not a breakthrough that guarantees my success in my efforts, or one that offers me fleeting happiness as it satisfies a personal appetite.
No. I found it was not even my breakthrough that I needed – it was God’s to be had. The Spirit of the living God breaking-through to a guarded, forbidden place in my soul. A place that had been left forgotten, in darkness, and over time crowded by thickets webbed of insecurity and fear — a wilderness of uncertainty and doubt. Then layered over time with answers that distract and distort, forged by ungodly beliefs that masquerade as truth. In an effort to hide what has been used to hide — decorated with counterfeits of beauty, lovely things that pacify the passerby, so as not to bring attention to what lies beneath.
But none of these things satisfy. None of it can be left undisturbed when a living God with masterful hands, needs to reach the deep places to form and shape a soul.
But obstructions barricading the way in — they aren’t removed easily. God can make a way, not by force, but by the working of His Spirit, deeply and gently within, to bring me low — to a new place of surrender. The work of God, within my heart is not without my consent.
There is a wrestling and a fight, not with God, but with the flesh within – a struggle. Some hinderances need simply to be discarded. Others take effort to be untangled and painfully severed. The stubborn parts requiring much more — a Consuming Fire, until my heart’s cry from the deep place, becomes…
Strip me of it all Lord.
I am dry.
I am thirsty.
I am empty.
Purge me Lord
Cleanse me Lord.
Enter this place.
Have your way in me.
Breakthrough Lord, to the place I have forbidden.
Breakthrough Lord to the place I have hidden.
And then He comes, and BREAKS THROUGH.
Spring forth! Oh, Fountain of God — Fountain of Living Water that never leaves me thirsty.
528. He makes all things new.
529. Isaiah 43:19
530. Bible in 90 Days — anchoring my soul.
531. Worship — ushering the Presence of God.
533. God — who will meet me in the place I’m in.
534. C|Life| Home Church
535. Pastors who know the liberating truth of God’s word and have a gift to communicate it to the Body of Christ.
536. Gramma cooking breakfast.
537. Sly smiles and eyes daring me to come chasing the in-need-of-a-dipaer-change toddler.
538. Abruptly waking to an escaping toddler, chasing blurry eyed, onto the porch and finding myself embrace by the warmth of a beautiful morning sun.
539. Husband who is willing to listen to all my ramblings.
540. Faithfulness of Abba.
541. Him, making a way in and never ceasing from the work of the transformation of my heart.