I opened up about my personal battles, and I cannot omit that pride has had a place in my heart it shouldn’t have. Sometimes pride masks itself as false humility, and makes us blind. Not seeing it makes it difficult to guard our hearts from it, and we desperately need the Holy Spirit to call us out on it. He will and does, gently and because of His kindness, knowing if we continue down its path a fall is soon to follow.
Pride is when we begin to take credit for what only God could have done.
Pride is not always recognizable at first, but fear of failure is a symptom. In those first steps — the ones that seem giant, requiring large doses of courage and faith that come at the beginning of something new God is calling me to — I am fully aware of my inability. My dependence is utterly on God, trusting He will do what He said He will.
A few steps later, when I see a bit of success, it’s easy to take credit for it. Before long, my faith and trust begins to rest greater on my own ability.
Pride is having more trust in your own abilities, than in God.
When it’s time for the next giant leap of faith, I’m staring squarely in the face of my incapability and powerlessness, again. Sometimes, it’s only then I realize how far my heart has strayed from sole dependence on God, His grace, and His favor in my life.
God whispered in my ear, “I brought you this far, what makes you think you’ve got to go the distance on your own? You trust, and watch what I would do. You do your part, the possible, and I’ll do mine, the impossible.”
God is faithful to lead us into His truth, and many times He’ll use His people to do it. He’s used the team I’ll be going to Africa with to both humble and encourage me, seeing their hearts, and His handiwork in all of this.
I want you to meet them — the World Help Africa Bloggers.
Matt Appling, author of Life After Art wrote in words in his post about Africa that God used to slay my pride.
“I’m not going to save the world…No, the few days I spend in Africa are not about me, not about my efforts, not about my story. I am going to Africa to witness God’s story unfolding. I am going to see how God is saving the world. I am going to see God’s redemption pouring through the pain. And whatever I contribute to that will be a drop in the ocean of God’s love. If God decides to use me, I’ll be grateful.”
Dan King, a.k.a. BibleDude, author of The Unlikely Missionary and Activist Faith, shared his testimony of how God changed his life the first time he went to Africa, and is a testimony to me of God’s goodness and sovereignty.
“That trip broke me in ways I never could have imagined. It changed the course of my life forever. It lit a fire in me not only for global missions, but also for local outreach and ministry. So when I step foot on the ground in Kampala on January 16th, it’ll be a sort of homecoming. I’ll be returning to the place where God started a deep work in my spirit. And I’m expecting this next journey to spark just as much (if not more) inside me as the first one did…”
Noel Yeatts, whom I’ve told you about, here, and is the author of Awake — she’s planned all this. She’s been on the front lines every single day, forging ahead through difficulty, accomplishing much more than I’ll ever know. She’s never missed an opportunity to express her gratitude to us. Without her, I wouldn’t have this opportunity.
Noel calls herself an everyday wife and mother trying to change the world. She’s changed mine. I am challenged to live the rest of my life in a way that could help save another, because of how she lives her life.
Emily Wierenga has authored several books — see here. God has used her words to reach deep places in my heart — deep places that cry out to deeper places. I had the honor of meeting her in person. Just a few minutes with her, and you’ll realize you are breathing in the fragrant aroma of Christ. Her passion for and brokenness in prayer has ignited a flame in my heart once again.
This opportunity I have, it’s a holy privilege to see where God is already working and meet Him there. Pride has no place in it. I am aware of my smallness again, not compared to other people’s greatness, but compared to God’s. This Africa mission’s success, or any other that God has called us to, is not dependent on our limited ability, but in God’s limitless ability — the One who makes all things possible.
