Dream big, great dreams!
We are supposed to have one or two or hundreds. They say dreams are supposed to be big enough to scare you. The problem was, I didn’t have a dream, or I didn’t know what it was.
I wanted a dream, not just any dream, but God’s dream for me. If truth be told, and if I dug deep and deeper still, I could find a dream, or at least—the seed of one.
Oh, yes. That’s what it was. I didn’t want to dig, and dig deeper still. I wanted to forget the notion or idea of a dream. The pain of seeing it unfulfilled became almost unbearable. Sprinkled daily with the lies that I wasn’t good enough anyway. Or that God overlooked me because I didn’t qualify, and I was only good for scrubbing toilets and washing dirty underwear. Those things, I was even failing at doing them—as unto the Lord. Insecurity and doubt made sure the dream stayed buried deep.
And disappointment—oh, how it stings.
Having a dream unfulfilled, the Bible calls hope deferred and even affirms it makes one’s heartsick. (Proverbs 13:12) I’ve heard it be called depravation of desire. In honesty, I think it feels like death. Feeling void of purpose is an emptiness that creates a hollow suffering that I do not even have words to convey.
But, the seed of my dream had to die, because Jesus said it is necessary to produce life. Unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies first, it will not bear fruit. It’s through the process of dying where I lost my life, and that is the purpose.
Listen carefully: Unless a grain of wheat is buried in the ground, dead to the world, it is never any more than a grain of wheat. But if it is buried, it sprouts and reproduces itself many times over. In the same way, anyone who holds on to life just as it is destroys that life. But if you let it go, reckless in your love, you’ll have it forever, real and eternal. (John 12:24-25 MSG)
God had to first establish me in my call as wife and mama, and be reckless in my love for my family. A call that He did not want want me to resign to, but embrace with joy and passion. I have—through an eighteen year long process.
But, in these last few months there has been a breakthrough. Three months ago, I hit publish on these words…
That place guarded and hidden was where I kept the hope of a dream.
No place can be left undisturbed when a living God with masterful hands needs to reach the deep places to form and shape a soul. And He has been working, shaping deeply and gently within, so that I may unearth the dream. Even that process, has been difficult, yet glorious.
God has worked relentless on my heart to get me to believe what He already knows is true. Why is it so hard to DARE to believe? Because it’s easier to believe the negative. It just is. Sometimes, it feels scary to hope again. But, what will happen if we actually believe what God says about us?
More than we could ever imagine.
Like the prayer Paul prayed, I pray “that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you will know what is the HOPE of His calling…” (Ephesians 1:18 NASV)
And truly believing Him, “Who, by the [action of His] power that is at work within us, is able to [carry out His purpose and] do superabundantly, far over and above all that we [dare] ask or think [infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, hopes, or dreams].” (Ephesians 3:20 AMP)
He’s asked me to believe. And I am learning to, but I am still very much in the process, and this process—it is the the story He’s writing. What I am learning, while I am learning, I will do my best to share with you.
But this, to know who I am in Christ—
I know even more surely now—
is really not about me.
Knowing who we really are in Christ, is not really about us at all. It’s about Him, for Him, so that we may have the confidence and the boldness to shine bright His light so the darkness of this world will flee. So the lost may know this truth—Christ came and died and rose from the dead for them to have life. So the story of His redemption can be written in us and through us. So we may bring hope and life to the impoverished—both in soul and body.
Today, remember, no one can take away your God-given dream. You have God-given purpose. The devil knows he cannot take your life-purpose from you, but he WILL try and keep you disillusioned about it. <– Tweetable, eh?
In the book, Awake, by Noel Brewer Yeatts, she wrote, “When people hear a story of life changed, they are drawn to it, perhaps desperate to be a part of something like that. I believe it is something we all desire. We deeply want to make a difference in someone’s life. We want to leave our mark and know that our life has counted for something. We want to do something bigger than ourselves.”
This incredible opportunity I have to go on a trip with World Help for Operation Baby Rescue, began as a dream seed—a desperate desire to make a difference in this world, for His glory.
October 1-6th, I will be blogging from Guatemala. It is my privilege and honor to be able to use this space to share the message of this mission, and to ask you to join the Rescue. If you are able to give and it is on your heart to do so, you can here. When you share about this, it is it like planting a seed. We never really know who God is going to call to join the Rescue. That’s what I keep telling myself. Sharing is free, but it also takes courage. Click here to tweet about the rescue.